When it comes to the decision to have any type of cosmetic procedure, the choice regarding the changes someone you know wants to make to their body is their own decision. The choice to have plastic surgery such as a facelift or injectables including Botox and fillers should be made based on the changes they want to see when it comes to their appearance. However, there might come a point in time when the changes made to their appearance start to fall into the “overdone” category. If you ever feel like one of your friends or loved ones has gotten to the point that you don’t recognize them anymore, would you be honest and tell them the truth about overdoing it with plastic surgery?
Besides reaching a point where it is hard to recognize a person, there can also be a moment where you realize the face of a person is not moving so you can’t tell if they are happy or sad or experiencing any other emotions. The lack of movement on the face can be the result of too much Botox or a face that was pulled too tight during a facelift. Botox has grown in popularity as a way to reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles on the face without having to “go under the knife” for an invasive surgical facelift.
In addition, fillers have also grown in popularity as they restore volume that has been lost in the face due to the aging process. The use of these injectables has also extended to younger patients as people in their twenties and thirties are now having Botox and filler treatments as a preventative measure to try and hold off signs of aging in the face. For example, “Baby Botox” treatments are quite popular because this procedure uses lower doses of Botulinum toxin so the chance of injecting too much Botox that can limit facial expressions is reduced.
One of the first items you need to keep in mind when deciding what to say to a friend is to think about why they had a specific treatment. People have plastic surgery for a number of reasons, and they include a fear of looking old, insecurity, or simple vanity about their appearance. If you tell the person that their current appearance does not look like their natural self, they might consider your concern to be harsh in nature as opposed to caring or shared with good intentions.
In other words, be sure and determine the reasons why the person wanted to undergo the procedure in the first place. If you know that your friend has always been concerned about fine lines and wrinkles forming on the face or a hollow look to their cheeks, keep this in mind before you say anything to them. You don’t want to come across as judging them or stating your opinion in a way that impacts their self-esteem or also causes them to feel additional insecurities about their appearance.
An ideal way to start the conversation is to actually wait until your friend or loved one mentions the topic of having work done on their face. If the person asks if the changes to their appearance are noticeable, you can tailor your response to make sure you do not hit a sore spot in your response. You know how your friends respond to certain topics so you will have a good idea of how to phrase your response along with how far you can take the conversation without it becoming uncomfortable. This does mean that you might have to soften your response by saying something like, “Now that you have said something to me, I can certainly see some changes to your look.” The answer needs to be positive and even reassure the person that they have always looked good in your eyes. Give them a compliment and bring up another topic instead of telling them something to the effect of “You used to look better before the procedure.”
As mentioned earlier, you know how your friend will respond to a conversation about their appearance. If you think the person can handle you being completely honest with your answer, go ahead and share your real opinion. Even if you think the person won’t be upset with an honest answer, you still need to be careful because you don’t want to be so honest that you also make them feel they have done “a bit too much” to their appearance.
You also need to decide if it is worth saying anything at all. You might be upset or concerned by the fact that your friend does not look the same, but this is also something you need to accept. The person might be very happy with the changes to their look so there is no reason to upset them just because you are not a fan of their appearance. If they like the way they look, it is more than likely not your place to say anything to them. You do not want your feelings about their new look to ruin your friendship.